i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Randomize
