You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
FUCK WHALES
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
