it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
