I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
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