we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
