she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Randomize
