my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
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