Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
Randomize
