I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Randomize