Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I have fence marks all over my body
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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