its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
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