I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
