awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
