Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
