i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
