On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Randomize
