Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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