Quick, to the slutcave!
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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