You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
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