Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize