Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
