Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
one two three fourrrrnication!
i used baking grease as lip gloss
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
