I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
just found out that she named her cat after me.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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