I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
True strength comes from lack of pants
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
