I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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