I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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