I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Randomize
