Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
