that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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