Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
