I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
