Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
