Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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