Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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