Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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