My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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