So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
