kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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