The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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