I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
