Kiss
Puke
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Randomize
