this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
These tits shall not be calmed
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Randomize
