Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Randomize
