please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Randomize
