when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
