Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
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