Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Randomize