my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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