Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
My dick has a subreddit
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
