Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Randomize
