I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Randomize
